Mist filters the sun
in burning suffusion,
over swollen, but still, Nar.
Green banks curving in black tufted reeds,
blackberry scent lolling.
*
Grey, clinging vapour,
Pours over and shrouds.
Bleached storcks,
Emaciated stubble of
Summers green grass
(A work in progress)
awesome.
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Lovely imagery, The way you've made the atmosphere seem to cling to surfaces like folds of material is a perfect discription of the suffocating nature of winter mists.
ReplyDeleteJust a minor point in line 3: do you mean 'storks' the birds, or 'stalks' as in blades of grass? The phrase 'bleached storks' makes me think of salt-stained wooden jetties jutting out into the sea. Its also reminiscent of the sleakness of off shore wind turbines. Its a strong image too. :)
It was mispelled, stalks, tho now i am intrigued by this stork notion. Its strange that you should imagine a coastal scene as i concieved this whilst walking through the ways by the river. The imagery was there, i merely translating.
ReplyDeleteI wrote it directly here so it hasnt suffered great thought yet. I'll keep my eyes peeled for the next stanza.
Summer's stanza added.
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